A problem that'll take two years to solve

I HAVE a revelation which will shock number-crunchers everywhere; 24 months is no longer the same length as two years!

With the house gaily decorated, presents underneath the tree and the weather outside on the wintry side I know it's that special time of year again; the time when I get annoyed with the car insurance industry. This year, it's over the idea that 24 months and two years aren't the same thing.

I insured my Rover knowing I have one full year of No Claims Bonus from 2009 on the old Mini, 11 months on the Renault 5 this year and another six on another policy covering the Mini, which overall, is more than two years' worth of driving, during which time I haven't made a single claim.

Fairly enough, the Rover's insurers wanted proof of this, and although I haven't had all the paperwork to hand I've sent details of the NCB proof I have to hand right now - the two from this year - which both they and the previous company agree counts as one years' NCB between them. I am also in the process of sending the policy on the Mini which I had in 2009, which when it arrives in the post, will confirm a second 12 months of not claiming.

What I'm worried about is that the Rover's insurers won't see it that way, in which case I owe them £115 for the privilege of redefining how long 24 months is.

What's worse, the warning letter they sent to me on November 28th gave me ten days to sort my affairs out, which I would have done had one of my relatives not decided it was his post, ignored it, come back to it and then told me more than a week after he'd got it that I "might want to sort it out". So essentially I'm running the risk of being penalised to the tune of £115 because someone else had picked up my post and neglected to mention it.

I'm not the stereotypical Yoof who cost the car insurance industry millions by just not bothering at all; I insure all my cars fairly, squarely and honestly, I drive safely, I pay their ridiculously high premiums on the dot and - most importantly for them - I don't ring them up with those bothersome "claims" they're always moaning about. Yes, I'm a petrolhead, but I'm one who doesn't break the law.

Maybe, when I'm older and wiser, I'll share this story with my children in 20 years' time. Oh no, wait, make that 240 months...